Monday, August 18, 2008
For those of you wondering.....
Yes, I'll admit, I am a little shocked too. Everything was SO completely different this time with the pregnancy, I kind of thought it was going to be a boy... Guess I was wrong....along with about 1500 other people!
Again, I am having a little anxiety.......... ok, A LOT of anxiety about having another girl. I think I had a panic attack when I found out with Grace, but she is so much different than I thought she'd be. I think I am most nervous about the teenage years. I wonder if the Lord is trying to pay me back for the grief I caused my mother during those years with TWO of my own. I mean, if that's the case, let's just say I hope the Lord comes back before then, and I will be earnestly praying for the rapture.
Everything looked perfect with the baby, they closely examined her feet and they were straight as an arrow (although grace's were too at this stage!). But thankfully they will be monitoring the baby's size and will induce hopefully before she gets too squished up in there.
I was thinking on the way home, that the knitting together of this child has NOTHING to do with me. I can take my vitamins, eat healthy, etc. but at the same time, I've been sick, puking, trying to eat, puking, losing weight, etc...and the Lord has taken care of everything. I'm not saying that it's easy to trust him when your children are inside the womb, but you really don't have a choice.
When I think about the tweens and teens, I am mortified... but why do I think that the Lord has less control over them then? Why do I think that I am the sole predictor of how they will turn out. Don't get me wrong, I know what an impact parental guidance has on kids, but the truth is, that if Chris and I are dead and gone before they hit their teens the Lord still holds those girls in HIS hands, and HE will direct their steps. We will do everything we can to direct them in the Lord, but ultimately it's not about us. NOT AT ALL. That's comforting.... Maybe because I am still freaking out a little, but we'll be OK.... They will be OK....
I am running through the millions and millions of mistakes I could make in parenting girls and the resulting consequences.... why do I do this to myself? I've just got to remind myself that it's not solely up to me....If it was, LORD knows it would be a disaster!
So praise the Lord that the baby is healthy and whole, now if we could all gather together and pray for the teenage years.....Oh, and for the second coming of Christ, that would be wonderful.
Here is just a side note that is pretty funny. Grace went to the ultrasound with us and when we pointed to the baby on the screen, she looked for a second and said: "eeeewwwwww.... ugy (ugly) baby!" The ultrasound tech almost fell out. Please don't let this be the start of sibling rivalry already.....