"The land you are crossing the Jordan to take possession of is a land of mountains and valleys that drinks rain from heaven. It is a land the Lord your God cares for; the eyes of the Lord your God are continually on it from the beginning of the year to it's end."
Here is the passage I read on the night before Harper was born. How fitting... huh? At that point I was still really apprehensive about having 2 children, about the actual delivery, how Grace would handle it, if Harper would be OK... etc... so many anxieties....I couldn't just be still, it was hard for me to trust....
I love that this verse says that it is a land of mountains and valleys that drinks rain from heaven... I know that there will be days that I don't think I can physically do it... there will be days where all 3 of us have a meltdown at the same time... I still have questions about what I should do if both kids have a need at the same time... how do I choose? What do I do if they are both wailing, or Grace is flailing about on the floor in a fit and the baby needs to be fed? Not to mention, how in the heck do you leave the house with 2 kids? How do you go to the grocery...and Lord, how am I going to go to the Goodwill with 2?
I know that all these things will work out. My prayer is that I will just take one day at the time, give myself grace if the house is filthy, the garbage stinks, and there is a playdate at my house on the same day... Grace if I make the wrong decision, or what if my oldest feels left our or neglected because the baby needs so much attention... I just can't worry about these little things. I can feel that these are what Satan is going to attack me with. I have to believe that the Lord will give me the strength I need for each day, and that is all I need to rest in...
As for an update... I am feeling awesome... don't even really feel like I had a baby. My cold is finally going away too! Yea! Emotionally, I feel like a million bucks... I haven't felt overwhelmed like I did when we brought Grace home; Even though Harper is spitting up regularly, she hardly ever cries, poor thing could have puke coming out her nostrils and mouth and barely even whimper. She is sleeping at least 4 hour stretches at night. Last night I had to wake her after 5 hours to feed her. Grace is doing so well. She has only had one major meltdown, but she was exhausted and had been out of her routine for a while. We put her in her room to get her fit out, and about 10 minutes later she was sound asleep in the middle of the floor. She loves 'her baby' and wants to help and hold her. If she's not interested in the baby, she is running around and doing her thing like usual. She hasn't really shown any jealousy yet (I know we are only 4 days in here... ) I am totally impressed with how well she is doing.
All these things are a complete answer to prayer. As for the medical stuff, we will go see a Cardiologist next week, just as a precaution, but Harper seems to be doing very well. Praise the Lord!